To which side do I belong?

This reader’s response will be to Minutes of Glory written by Ngugi wa Thiong’o (James Ngugi). The main thesis of this story is that one must like themselves in general or they make themselves become a repulsive to others due to lack of self confidence and lack of self esteem.

There have been many times that this pattern continues to happen throughout childhood. First, it starts in grade school when children tease you and pick on you because you are different. This usually causes children to have a lowered self esteem about themselves. It then happens again in high school. The teasing and bullying may or may not be present at this point but the feeling as if no one notices you and are an outcast to the school population does exist. “Beatrice as a sweeper and bedmaker became even more invisible”. In grade school I constantly had this little boy pick on me all the time. At one point I had actually started to think that I was all the things that he said. Being a child your self esteem can be easily broken. I eventually told my mother, and she informed me that, boys at that age, usually tease you because they liked you. She told me that when he says all those mean things to me to turn it around as if he sending you tons of compliments. My mother’s idea worked. From that point on I no longer let the crude insults hurt my confidence because he was truly giving me tons of praise.

The part of the text that I agree with is when Ngugi wrote, “ Had she not, in Limuru, seen girls blacker than herself transformed overnight from ugly sins into white stars by a touch of skin-lighting crèmes? And men would ogle them, would even take with exaggerated pride of their newborn girl friends. Men were strange creatures, Beatrice thought in moments of searching analysis. They talked heatedly against Ambi, Butone, Firesnow, Moonsnow, wigs, straightened hair; but they always went for the girl with an Ambi-lightened skin and head covered with a wig made in imitation of European or Indian hair”. This portrait of men still exists today in our society. Men talk so much about wanting a girl that is all natural. No cosmetic surgery, breast implants, chemical treatments to the hair. Just a good old fashion pretty woman. Yet, they turn around and are attracted and date these same women that they just talked so badly about. How can you hate one thing but love it when it appears in your presence. Men can not have it both ways they must choose which kind of woman that they want and stick with that image. Of course, we women all know that this will not happen.

The battle that Beatrice is having with herself to become the colonized person or remain the native person is very challenging to me. At first, Beatrice resented having the name Wanjiru because it made her sound as if she was not beautiful; she now goes by her Christian name Beatrice which refers to beauty. She then tries to lighten her skin using the Ambi cream. “Beatrice never tried to find the root cause of this black self-hatred, she simply accepted the contradiction and applied herself to Ambi with vengeance. She had to rub out the black shame”. It is not a shameful thing to be black, but living in a colonized country you are the minority, and the minority is colonized into thinking that they are not equal to others if their appearance does not match that of the colonizer. I learned that there has to be a balance to everything in life. You can retain your name because in African culture your name comes from great meanings and also assimilate your appearance to what you are comfortable with. It does not have to be the appearance of the colonizer but an appearance that makes you feel proud to be of African descent and one that you can equally appreciate as being beautiful. “ She went to the mirror and looked at her mew self”.

A woman’s power is no longer the ability to give birth and care for and nurture children. Her power comes from the great things that she has done throughout her life and the success that she has obtained. Power should not be seen as a sexual attraction, but as a great accomplishment that we have strived to obtain. The way that one dresses, talks, and the cars that they drive show power; but let us not forget that the greatest power that we, as humans, have in our possession is the mind.

Ngugi wrote this story with a gender bias. He felt that when women act out that they should get punished. This I don’t agree with because when men act they should receive the same type of punishment. Although, I do like that Ngugi showed how the people at the bar were indeed hypocrites. These were the same people that would not give Beatrice( Wanjiru) any of their precious time and just seen her an invisible soul floating around making beds and sweeping. Once she returned and was dressed and carried herself with poise and confidence everyone wanted some of her attention. Once she was arrested, and taken out by the police the people in the bar all went back to ignoring Beatrice and making fun of what she has done.

I enjoyed the text although I did not like how the story ended. This text is used more so as a work of art than entertainment because it is shows how the colonization of the mind can affect the person. So, there is a message within story. I have enjoyed reading this story and others by Ngugi. You can distinctly see a difference in the endings when he writes compared to women that wrote short stories at this time period on similar topics.